(the real on a weekday: no makeup + messy hair + active wear)
At a time where depression and anxiety is at its highest, we have to stop and think where is this coming from???
It's a no brainer to find out that a lot has to do with social media comparison and self-judgment.
You likely know this situation:
You're scrolling down Instagram, intaking one perfect picture after another, depicting the perfect life.
Next, you inner voice chimes in: I don't have that life, that body, that family or that job what a failure I must be!
For the rest of the day, you feel everything you do it's not good enough, cause you don't have that beautiful non-realistic perfect life.
But have you stop to think, that that same self-trashing talk is the top barrier for you to really achieve a life of freedom and joy, not perfection, but fulfillment.
Are you your own worst critic???
Over time, being our own worst critics wears down confidence, connected later to: low self-esteem, depression, anxiety and eating disorders.
So, what can you do??
For starters, make a habit of cutting yourself some slack! At first it will feel very awkward, as you may be already a professional at giving self-critique.
With time, the more you do it the more you will stop yourself just in time before doing severe self-harm.
Think of it of daily mini-interventions that will do wonders! Try one of these easy actions to get back up in no time.
1. BE CURIOUS ABOUT PEOPLE THAT BRING UP JEALOUSY! When self-criticism creeps in a social setting or even through social media, ask that person genuine questions.
Start with basics:
Where are you from? What do you like to do? that will help you shift from jealousy to connection with that person. More likely you will find out that person is a human as you are, they have the good, the bad and the ugly as we all do.
And if that person really has all their shit together, then use it as inspiration, ask the questions: How did they start? What inspires them? Daily habits that make them successful?
This will boost your mood and will increase positive energy in your head.
2. HAVE A DAILY REMINDER. Write down daily affirmations, and have them where you can see them. (mirror, wallet, laptop)
Affirmation: I live my life free of judgement.
Specially when feeling judgy got to your affirmation, and repeat the words silently, you will start to feel at ease.
3.LAUGH AT YOUR SELF-CRITIQUE. Laughing about silly self-harming things we do and say really takes the power away from them. When you find yourself saying internally I'm a failure! I want her life! Laugh and say come on dude, really? Where is this coming from??
4. ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR FEELINGS. When we feel low, less than, we often try to ignore our feelings, it's awkward and weird to be feeling that. Instead of ignoring them as you usually do, acknowledge them.
Start by finding ways to feel more positive, like a gratitude exercise (thinking of 3 things you are grateful for), going to a yoga sesh, cuddling with your dog - anything that shifts your mood.
As you strengthen that muscle, you will be able to acknowledge and pin-point your feelings and the source of the negative thoughts way more easily and return to a more peaceful state.
Now, help me, spread the love, there might be someone out there, who needs words of encouragement.
lots of love,